Correct me if I'm mistaken, but I believe Varentines Day has its origins in 16th Century Ming Dynasty China, where the only socially acceptable method of informing a member of the opposite sex that you were romantically interested was to paint a heart on or near the genitals of an infant or small man, and train it to subtly expose itself, relaying the message at the most opportune moment.
This cultural tradition continued right up until 1982, after the introduction of the One-Child policy in 1979 had dramatically decreased the amount of available infants and thus the rate of romantic developments in China. Primitive methods like cards and "words" finally replaced the Subtly Exposed Infant system.
*EDIT 20-2-12 Just in case you have any doubts, yes - all of the above is a joke. Varentine's Day is not real. -----
A source of unending hilarity, this priceless ($2) artefact was chanced upon by myself in a second-hand store, and I believe it encapsulates all that Varentines day is about.
Happy Varentines Day everyone
~Simon xxxx
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